Thousands in Debt and Still Making $9 and Hour

I could go on and on about this, but I’m sure it’s been done before… so I will make this a short rant.

1.  Why did I think I would have no trouble at all getting a grown-up job after college?  Oh that’s right… because everyone SAID I would, like it was some kind of guarantee!!

2.  How come only the trashiest, most rude and poorly dressed, unprofessional assholes get the best jobs at my County’s courthouse?  You know, the place that has the best starting pay rate, the best benefits, and gets every holiday off.  I guess you have to have a gang tattoo on your wrist and smell like alcohol to qualify to local government jobs in my hometown.

3.  Since when do you have to have 79 years of experience to be a good secretary??  Can’t you just be naturally organized and detail-oriented??

4.  Why on God’s green earth am I working in a shit-hole, raccoon-infested greenhouse and getting treated like crap for $9 measly dollars an hour and no benefits when I spent close to $80,000 on college tuition?? 

5.  Why am I spending all this time and money producing the most perfect resumes on the nicest cream colored paper and pretty much writing my cover letters with a goddamn quill pen using my own blood and not getting ONE phone call back. 

I don’t mean to be snotty, and I don’t think this is snotty… but whenever I go somewhere for personal business or something and see people working my dream jobs (secretary, human resources, anything in an office that doesn’t involve fertilizer or rose thorns) they are rude, look like crap, and don’t even DO anything that really takes any amount of talent or expertise?!  I could do these jobs too!  I could be the perfect secretary, the ideal Human Resources Assistant, even a reliable Call Center Representative!!  I’m not asking for the next position as CEO or even anything that would get me my own phone extension.  All I want is a job that pays double digits and hour and maybe offers benefits so I can go get my shitty old glasses replaced!!!  Why did I go to college if all I had to do to get one of these jobs is wear poor fitting clothing from Sirens and get a couple of visible tattoos and a bad attitude???

Who Are You, Florida?

After a drunken night out with my husband’s hockey team (which is an experience all on it’s own) I was left with many questions:  How can they drink so much and not die?  Does ‘hockey’ count as a language- because I can’t understand a word they’re saying?  Is this legal?  Where am I? etc. etc….

But a more important question that actually came up (in a drunken, ‘what is life all about’ kind of way, and stayed with me until the next morning is:  How come Florida is not like the rest of the Southern states?  They don’t have southern accents (I don’t think) and the state just doesn’t have the same feel as the rest of the South.  Now, between myself and a bunch of Canadians there was not much evidence to back up these claims- I have only been to Florida once and everyone had equal or less time logged there, but when you think about it- Florida really does seem to stand alone, the sore thumb of the United States, sticking out from the usual southern stereotypes us Yankees hold about the rest of the area.

I did a little research (i.e. typed in ‘Florida’ on Wikipedia) and could not find anything unique about the state that would set it apart from the rest of the area.  It was originally settled by the Spanish, and then some French people came, but was later conquered by the English (who cleverly armed the indigenous people with weapons and had them do the dirty work- sound familiar??).  AND, Florida WAS involved in the Civil War (I thought they weren’t for some reason, because I am an idiot who was robbed of a half decent education)-  They were the first state in the Confederacy! 

So, Florida DID have a different start, but eventually blended with the rest of the south and collected a similar history.  But why no accent then?  Why is it still so seemingly different from it’s neighbors?  Or is it?  Am I totally wrong?  What would I know anyway?

The only thing I can think of (if I am correct in assuming that Florida is different from the rest of the South) is because of the terribly small population prior to the Depression, and the difficult time the state had recuperating afterwards (Florida struggled until after WWII).  So I’m thinking that there just aren’t the same ‘roots’ in Florida as the rest of the south because the population didn’t really grow until much much later.  So maybe Florida is made up more of transplants from elsewhere, and does not hold the generations and generations of families like the rest of the southern states.  I don’t know, just a guess.  Can you grow cotton in Florida?  Is it because of the Everglades? 

Who Are You?

Update!  Oh my Gosh… I was just listening to WPR and they’re talking about Florida (election stuff) and one Florida guy mentioned that 75% of Florida’s population is from somwhere else!  That would explain some things I suppose.

Tom Cruise, Scientology, I don’t get it

I’ve been hearing a lot about the newest war going on: Internet Nerds vs. Scientology.  Being an internet nerd myself, I felt compelled to see what seemed to set things off in the first place… the infamous Tom Cruise video.  Supposedly the movie was removed from YouTube, but you can still view it on Gawker here.  So I checked it out and my opinion….

What’s the big deal?!

Yes, Tom Cruise sounds like an idiot, but what else is new?  I don’t find this video particularly frightening, like everyone said it was.  I’m not scared of Scientology either, and frankly I don’t give a shit what those people do any more than I care about what any other religious group does.  Sure there is evidence of Scientology ruining and/or taking the lives of both its followers and it’s critics, but how exactly is that different from Christianity or Islam, for example?! 

Tom Cruise babbling on and on about how great Scientology is and about how he knows all the answers and can cure people with his beliefs is no different from a Christian talking about how they ‘know’ God is watching over them and guiding them, and how people think prayer can actually cure illness, etc.  And as far as people killing themselves and/ or being killed and those deaths being linked to Scientology allow me to remind you of The Crusades and Suicide Bombers!  Of course not all Christians and Muslims are out there doing bad things, but not all Scientologists are like Tom Cruise!

I don’t care if people wage some kind of internet attack on Scientology, and I don’t care if Tom Cruise is an idiot -what else is new?  You would be wacked too if you had billions of dollars, lived in a celebrity bubble, and weren’t taking your meds!  And if we’re going to start criticizing religions and splitting hairs over what’s a cult and what’s a religion then I think we should be fair and include everyone.

You’re allowed to believe what you want, and as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone I don’t care if you believe in God or Time Cube or The Wonders- it’s your business.  BUT, to blacklist Scientology and it’s followers for killing people, hurting people, being weird, etc. let’s be fair and hold EVERY OTHER RELIGION to the same standard as well- because last time I checked, most main stream, accepted religions are guilty of the exact same thing as Scientology is.  How about that?  No, not every religious follower/ cult member is guilty of killing or hurting or even being weird, but I’m pretty sure every religion has some of that nasty stuff in its past and/or present.

Below are the results of a scientific study I did all by myself.  It compares Scientology with a widely accepted religion, in this case Christianity.  The ‘X’ means ‘yes.’

	Scientology	Christianity
Takes Billions of Dollars From Followers Each Year	X	X
Is Responsible for Countless Deaths of Followers and/or Critics	X	X
Followers Think Their Beliefs are the Only ‘Right’ Beliefs	X	X
Claim to Have Healing Abilities (through prayer, knowledge, help from a higher power, etc.)	X	X
Excuses Bad Behavior When it’s Done in the name of said Religion	X	X

So you’re allowed to believe what you want and belong to whatever religious group you want, but let’s just keep in mind that religion makes people do crazy things- things that are sometimes very wrong and sometimes very creepy.  So I don’t understand why Scientology is apparently so awful when there are countless other belief systems out there that are guilty of the same things Scientology is getting shunned for.  It’s all stupid if you ask me. 

The Ultimate Stupid Question

Stupid Questions!

Everyone asks stupid questions sometimes, maybe they just want to hear themselves talk.  Maybe they didn’t think before they asked.  Maybe they’re just plain dumb.

I hear a lot of stupid questions throughout my day, but my FAVORITE stupid question of them all is the one I will be focusing on.  So bear with me, it will take a little background information….

First you should know, I have a younger brother (my only sibling if you don’t count my dog-sisters) and along with many other unique characteristics- an intense interest in the keyboard, a passion for Hershey Kisses- and deep hatred for any other type of chocolate, a disproportionate big laugh for his thin frame, and living as one of 5 remaining Randy Travis fans, and eyelashes that women pay money for- he also happens to be disabled, physically and cognitively.  He was born 3 months early, had a ‘headbleed’, uses a wheelchair, is blind, etc.  But, he’s extremely healthy and (which may throw someone off as pegging us siblings) he is always happy. 

So my brother is disabled, which has led him down a different path than others.  He doesn’t go to your typical regular education classroom, he isn’t going to go to college, and he will always live with my parents (which isn’t that different when you look at all the post-grads living in mom’s basement I guess- minus the online gaming).

So whenever people I’m getting to know for the first time eventually ask me about my family, they ask if I have any siblings.  I say I have a younger brother and go on to talk about his age, his interests, etc.  Well when people hear that he is 20 they usually ask about school or college, which leads me to explain his disabilities.  And I kid you not…. 9 times out of 10 the next question goes as follows:

What is his life expectancy?

WHAT?!  And they always ask me with the same nonchalance as if they were asking what color his hair is.  As much as I get asked that question, it never fails to amaze me how fucking stupid everyone is.  Really.  That’s a stupid question.  If you ever meet someone who happens to have a disabled friend, family member, whatever, don’t ask them that.

The last fucking moron to ask me this question was my husband’s grandmother.  She’s usually the most polite person in the world- Grandpa was a mayor back in his day so she’s down with socializing- so this shocked me.  My eyes glazed over and I shrugged and said “I don’t know, normal?”  I should have asked her what hers was, and reminded her that the average life expectancy for Canadians is 80- was she getting nervous?

So that is by far, the most stupid question I have ever been asked.  What is even more stupid is how often I hear it!  What if it’s 21- and we were all terrified that this could be his last year with us?  Not every disability is terminal!  Do you ask someone who’s just been diagnosed with cancer what their life expectancy is?  How can anyone even know that?!?!  And something about my husband’s family (because I’m pretty sure they have all asked the exact same question) is the follow up response to that question, which is usually a story about disabled people getting gassed.  I kid you not.  Gas.

The first time I met my husband’s parents my brother’s disabilities came up, and after the life expectancy question, my father-in-law goes on to inform me that during the Holocaust the Nazis threw handicapped people in the gas chambers alongside the Jews and homosexuals.  Grandma, on the other hand, had a much more original segue.  She, upon hearing about my brother, was reminded of the heartwarming story of the man in Saskatchewan had a disabled daughter and took her out to his car and gassed her because he couldn’t stand to see her suffer.  He’s in jail now, but if he gets out I would like him to gas me too because that’s a hell of a lot better than living in Saskatchewan, thank you.  But, honestly, how am I not in jail for assualting my inlaws?  The Ultimate Stupid Question is one thing- surprisingly everyone pulls that original out of their ass with me- but the follow-up gassing tales? 

My brother may be the disabled individual in this story, but being a rude fucking idiot is a much worse affliction.

Possible future answers to “What is his life expectancy?”

• 457
• longer than yours (*Kill Idiot*)
• The doctors say 20 (*long pause*)  Oh my God!!! (*weep*)
• Well, actually we’re having him cloned…
• Whenever my dad decides to install that gas chamber
• Favorite:  Well that’s a stupid question, isn’t it?